Sunday, April 12, 2009

dreams in the age of publicity

I dreamed that I had accidentally gotten on the wrong bus, a school bus instead of a city bus, and that all the passengers were Ojibway. It turns out they were heading out to a field just outside town, where they were going to have a healing circle (I don't even know if this is a done thing or where my brain got this from. The details were vague.)

When we got to the field, we all piled off the bus and I tried to explain that I'd ended up there by accident, but nobody minded, and they invited me to join in. I politely declined, and it became clear that I had to just wait for them to be done so I could take the bus back with them.

However, I urgently needed to pee.

There were some buildings behind the field, tall brown brick, and as there was no activity around them I assumed they were abandoned. There's gotta be a good spot to pee over there, I thought.

As I approached the side of one, I realized that I could see in through the windows, and discovered that they were retirement homes, full of white-haired people in flowered armchairs watching television. It did not occur to me that I might walk in the lobby and ask to use a toilet. Instead, I tried to find a spot outside where I could pee where I would not be visible to any of the residents.

I found such a spot, I pulled down my pants and emptied my bladder.

Then I heard a laugh and looked to my right. Crouched very nearby, there was a young guy, maybe 20, wearing a ballcap, with an easy grin on his face.

Alarmed, I pulled up my pants fast and he said "No no, don't worry. That was cool!"

I smiled politely, and said, "Uh, thanks... I'm going to go."

"So cool," he said, "That I'm totally posting that on YouTube!!" and he waved his fancy phone in my direction. I noticed another guy was with him, also laughing.

"I'm going to call it 'Woman Urinates Behind Building'!" and they both laughed, waggling their phones in the air. When I looked back, one of them was filming my piss running down the walkway.

You know how this ends:

I woke up, got out of bed, and peed.