Mr. Able: i worked for my dad once
Roo: how was it?
Mr. Able: he paid me 10 pounds to scrape barnacles off of about 200 planks
how was it? it was absolutely fucking horrible
you can't imagine the smell
and barnacles? they don't WANT to come off
that is hilarious and awful
Mr. Able: yeah
that and gutting whelks are probably my two least favourite jobs ever
Roo: what the hell are whelks?
Mr. Able: large shellfish
you have to remove their gut cos it is full of sand
so you squeeze them until the end of the gut pops through the skin, then grab hold and yank it out
Roo: oh god
in the worst job ever category, A and my friend Chris McC always tells of a biology student who got a job masturbating rats in a lab
Mr. Able: frankly wanking rats would be a doddle compared to gutting whelks
Mr. Able: i bet they have rat wanking sticks or something
Roo: I think he had to use his fingers
my friend Graham had a job working in the field as a bio student and he had to milk red squirrels
Mr. Able: whereas whelks? you have to pull the guts out with your fingers
Roo: grasping their tiny teets between forefinger and thumb
Mr. Able: and they are slippery!
Roo: fuck, that whelk job takes the cake I think
Mr. Able: you can milk anything with nipples
I want to post some of this convo
on my blog
Mr. Able: do it do it do it!
Mr. Able: i remember blogs
are people still writing those things
i can barely keep up with tweets nowadays
my brain is fucked