rolf my hot auric body

One of my first big jobs after university was working in a tall black glass office building at the corner of King and University in Toronto. (More on that some other time, perhaps if I'm ever feeling nostalgic for unrelenting frustration, being underpaid, coma-inducing water cooler talk, and having to wear nylons.)

Because of that job and a bad ergonomic set-up, I developed an RSI that pretty well pooched my right shoulder. You wouldn't think clicking a mouse all day could hurt so much, but believe you me, it can if you are doing it at the end of an extended arm on a mid-chest-height desk for eight hours at a time for months on end.

From other earlier more athletic antics, I also tend to have a tight right piriformis muscle which can make my hip ache (and then my lower back) when I do a lot of sports.

I like to be active and often feel limited by these asinine infirmities, so I've tried all kinds of things to fix them: yoga, tai chi, massage therapy, acupuncture, cranial-sacral therapy, lying with a tennis ball under my butt cheek, and even, yes, rolfing, which inspired my friend Blackbeltbarrister to write to me with the excellent subject line used for this post and which is only obliquely relevant to what I'm writing here.

But since I have used it in the headliner, I'll digress for a moment and explain. Rolfing is basically where they tear at your flesh and you scream inside and maybe hyperventilate a bit, and then you feel better after because you are no longer in excruciating flesh-tearing pain and all that oxygen from hyperventilating was a refreshing change from holding your breath all day because you hate your job.*

So after a trail run yesterday, a friend introduced me to her friend the massage therapist and 3rd year student osteopath who cured her sinus infection by manipulating her palate. Who cares if this is placebo or real? I'm in. Due to a last-minute cancellation, I got to see him this morning at 8 AM.

Verdict: osteopathy is blowing my mind. Dude zeroed right in on all the problem bits. Since the session, which went for an hour and a half and was very gentle but intense, I've been feeling my entire body realigning and shifting. Oh, and I've also wanted to pass out in a bucket of my own drool. He said that might happen, but it will pass.

Bedtime!


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* The most intense session is when they rolf your ass. I am not even kidding about this. YOUR ASS.