Wednesday, January 11, 2006

so that's what the clowns are for

I have this friend at work who says the most outrageous things. I don't know anyone like him. He has a habit of making spontaneous, bizarre -- but strangely comprehensive -- pronouncements about odd and obscure things.

One time, I wrote down something he said and emailed it to him. He was incredulous. "Wow. I'm insane" he said. And he probably is. But he has a sweet and non-threatening demeanor, and I don't think he's a danger to society.

Tonight after work, around 7pm, I was sitting alone on the sofa in our office's open-concept kitchen/lounge having a restful moment. This odd friend of mine appeared and chatted with me for a bit about how being an architect would be thankless work that would fill your heart with hate. There was a bit of silence, and he placed an empty glass on the edge of the counter. Then he crouched low and pushed it off the counter, but half-caught and tapped it lightly with his hand near the floor as it fell, so that it tumbled to the ground.

"Just enough to save its life."

I waited. Here it comes, I thought. A really good one. And how richly rewarded I was when, with a straight face and in all earnestness, he stated:

"It's like how trapeze artists, when they're performing without a net, they always have clowns around. If a trapeze artist falls during a performance, a clown will run up to them as they're falling and punch them - with the real intention of hurting them, and of hurting themselves - so that they'll go limp before they hit the ground. It's how they don't die."

If you think that's good, you should hear his theory about gin and vitamins.


At January 12, 2006 3:22 p.m., Blogger The Dude said...

That is really, really excellent. It reminds me of a Jack Handey quote:
"To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad."

At January 12, 2006 3:23 p.m., Blogger The Dude said...

This one is also good:
"You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea."


Post a Comment

<< Home